Monday 12 August 2013

The Mountaintop and The Cliff :Another Long Post

Before I start I just want to say, You Have Been Warned.

So as a Christian I have what are called "Mountain Top Experiences" which are like peaks of spiritual enlightenment or closeness with God etc. They are really good and camp has always been one of them. The whole environment of camp is so spiritual sometimes you really don't want to leave, you'd want to live in the place forever... where being a Christian is easy, and there are pretty girls, and no homesickness (in my case homesickness means more like being sick of home than a longing to return there.) But unfortunately one can't. with every mountain top there is a valley that needs to be returned to.

While I'm on the topic though I'll talk about camp...

My denomination (ugh.. hate the term) owns a campsite and holds 5 camps there every year. This year, for the fourth consecutive year, I've gone to Camp 4, which caters to the 15-17 year group (I'm 17-going-on-18). But basically I was among the oldest persons on camp, and one of the more "experienced" Christians as well. As a "senior camper" I was treated more like a counsellor than a camper too, though more on the responsibility side, not much privilege, but this was pretty convenient since the counsellor for my dorm didn't come back to camp.

Now the 1st question I asked my dorm mates on the Saturday night was "Why did you come to camp?" and when it reached my turn to answer I answered, "Well, firstly it's a spiritual experience and I seek after spiritual experiences, Secondly I love to be surrounded by people (I probably thought "mostly female people" as I said this), and finally I hate my yard. " or something to that respect. So I'll address those three aspects because they are the most important to me.

Spiritual Experience: the camps are set up quite spiritually. You're generally secluded from the outside world and it's distractions, daily chapel, dorm devotions, other sessions etc. obviously show that the aim of the camp is in fact the spiritual growth of the campers. While these helped though, my two greatest spiritual experiences were not contained in any of these.

The first one happened on  the Tuesday. After 3 days of miserably unbearable heat rain fell (that's enough of a blessing to be a spiritual experience though). But some special things happened. The first reaction of us male campers was to "run up an dung like eedyat" in the rain. We played with a Frisbee, we just shouted and really enjoyed ourselves. Now normally the counsellors wouldn't have allowed this to happen because of health concerns, but next thing you know they were encouraging us and soon enough, and I kid you not, about 80% of the make dorm was outside bathing. Now why was this a spiritual experience? Because, my dear reader, from that moment on there was a unity and oneness amongst us male campers that was nothing short of miraculous. There was no Dorm 1, Dorm 2,Dorm 3, Dorm 4 or Dorm 5, just the male dorm.
"Truly, O God of Israel, our Savior, you work in mysterious ways."
Isaiah 45:15 (New Living Translation)
 
The second one however wasn't as heart-warming. It happened on the Thursday after the banquet (we, unfortunately were assigned dates, I was lucky though, I drew "Rita"... she is probably one of the most awesome people I know. I couldn't quarrel... anyways). I had been a bit disappointed that I didn't get some recognition for my awesomeness at camp (found out later that they decided to give someone else a chance to be Camp King... long story... bleh) so I was walking in the moonlight a bit and ended up going into the dorms last.  I entered the dorms in confusion. For some reason my dorm mate, a really chill guy, someone I'd run jokes with and one of the few males I talked to on camp, was completely furious being held back by about 5 other guys. Apparently, and this sounds completely ludicrous, someone had burst his balloon. Upon hearing this I knew something else was up. This wasn't the type of guy to be so easily ticked off, and really and truly this was the result of some spiritual warfare. The counsellors eventually quieted down the dorm. and a few people spoke, including me. Now Why was this a spiritual experience? Because, my dear reader, it showed me that anything God institutes is being attacked by the Adversary. Something wanted the unity we had established only two days before to be destroyed.
"Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour."
1 Peter 5:8 (King James Version)
 
We also had a really good speaker during the Chapel sessions (I never slept once), so those were my biggest spiritual occurrences for the week.
 
Social Interaction: camp gathers people from all around Jamaica, different backgrounds, different personalities, different ways of pronouncing "d'even". Of course there is the male:female ratio to be established, and since it was about 26:42 (not quite 1:2) I was pretty much comfortable. I spent most of my time with two friends I made from my first year at Camp 4, one of which was my reason for coming to Camp 4 and not graduating to Camp 5 and the other I've talked about previously, and another friend I'd met last year, whose voice is near as close to my heart as crackers. They are nothing but good times and I almost made the mistake of ignoring the other awesome femmes on camp. Luckily some awesomeness cannot be hidden, and soon enough I was all over the place. I met some wonderful people, and got probably hundreds of chances to make girls laugh/smile (which I discovered is the reason I love their company so much). 
 
I didn't neglect the "bredren dem" though. I couldn't, really. I made fewer male friends but I somehow managed to gain the respect of most of the dorm (between my Christian integrity *koff* and the fact that I was one of the few who was constantly surrounded by girls...) So I got along pretty well with all of them. We ran jokes, talked about the girls on camp (hehe, because there were some GIRLS on camp though) and general foolishness. And especially after the rain thing there was a brotherhood among us that was just natural.
 
Being Away From Home: A solid week away from home is ALWAYS a blessing, and probably a spiritual experience in and of itself.  
 
 
However, as much as I enjoyed by eight days of camp, they eventually ended, and I had to come home. I was tired as hell, but I delayed my return as much as possible, and maybe a bit more than that.
 
Now normally the glow of positive energy from camp lasts some time, like coming down from a mountain. Especially since I was absolutely elated about the results from my externals, AND I was coming home to an empty house. But there was no gradual decline. Simply speaking, there was no moderate decline of a slope, I fell off a cliff.
 
There was no greater zeal for reading my bible or praying or changing things in my life that there usually was. Neither was there the general feeling of Joy. The first thing that struck me at home was Loneliness. Not because my family was away, but just moving from being surrounded by 67 other people to 0... killed my vybe. So I went to bed. My Anti-Lust Protocol was simply overridden, as I found out when I woke up. I swear that the 45+ mins of "fondly remembering" some of my dear female campers that I woke up to was pretty intense. And this wasn't helped by the fact that I wasn't going to church today either. By nightfall my cursing had started back up again. And by time my parents had retired, I partook of strong drink.
 
I guess I had this coming. This Christianity thing is no cakewalk. And the further one traverses into it, the greater steps he/she has to take. All I can say now is "Please, Lord Forgive Me" and then face another day knowing He's still by my side. Regardless. 
 
-Me

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