Old Tie Chronicles

I haven't written here in a long time -blah blah blah- introductory statements...

I sit here barefooted (I somehow lost my socks)and cross-legged in a corner in the Top Hall, surrounded by dancers and Major Lazer, once again truant (I do that more and more these days) pretty much in a generally crappy mood. You see I am now experiencing one of those moments when my tolerance of  this damn school is at a low. 

Now for some context.

Tomorrow is Jamaica Day... and the Drama Club Wedding. As the Drama Club president that makes the upcoming day one shitstorm of stress and responsibility. Naturally we are were going to do a play during the Jamaica Day celebrations. Yes. Were. You see I am now 100% certain that the school has decided to do everything wrong this year, and so instead of celebrating Jamaica Day we'll be having the Jamaica (almost) Hour, since they decided to limit the "celebration" to an hour... then request 15mins from that hour. Thus Leaving 45 mins for the CELEBRATION OF OUR CULTURE AND HERITAGE, because that must be all that it deserves... 

This pissed me off. It still pisses me off. And as a result of this hostility (I mean what else could it be?) towards it all, we (myself and those who were helping me plan and practice the play) decided that we wont be presenting that day. I really hate the decision for 2 reasons:

• I don't want to be remembered as the Drama Club president who never did anything for Jamaica Day. It sounds petty and probably it is, but I remember the president before me, and her inactivity, and how I hated the club that year (though probably still not as much as I hate it now...) But I don't want to be remembered as "that president". 
• This year was my idea year. Where Drama Club is concerned I have had my best ideas this year from The Death of a Don to the The Heritage Story. I as really proud of myself for coming up with these ideas and even my ability to visualize and script to some detail these ideas were things I was really excited about. However, none of them will come to fruition while I'm here. Hopefully it will be possible in later years, but I won't see them. That deeply saddens me. 

But OK, no Jamaica Day presentation, at least I'll have the wedding. Well since I wasn't in complete control of that I was a bit behind concerning its planning and everything. I took a role as we were short of people, ok. But now, the day before the production we have little to nothing ready. Ticket sales at this point seem pretty dismal and I'm just pretty down. Obviously this is still my fault as the president. The club's falls are my falls, the club's triumphs are the club's triumphs. At least those are my sentiments.

Overall I'm pretty tired. Tired of everything.

Now I've been wearing the old tie all week. Most people haven't noticed, but more and more people are asking me "Why're you wearing the old tie?"

To me it's symbolic. Though I guess in the end it doesn't mean anything.  But to me the tie now symbolizes the "Old Chesta". The one I loved. The one that was fun. The one that never pissed me off ever goddamned day. As if wearing the old tie will bring it back .  I know it won't, but it doesn't mean I shouldn't wish it could.

So I will wear the old tie. Hell if I can I'll graduate in it, I will. Because the Old Chesta is the one I wished for 7 years to graduate from.

-Me